Oh hi.

It's been cold, really cold.

The fan in my room hasn't been turned on for two days, that's how cold it is. The rain started on Friday night, I remember because I was stuck in the club for an hour because of it, and hasn't stopped since then. Sleep has been good, so good that good dreams are slowly coming back to me.

Woke up today from one of the many, to a name and a number. Connie, and a number that isn't in use.

The dream's really simple, but a little complicated. Irony. I have no idea how it all started, but I sent her home in a cab or by my friend's car. We chatted on the way back to her home, she was hilarious. I sent her to her home's lift and asked for her number. That's all that I can remember from that dream. I really thought it was reality, but then I woke up from it. As always, I felt really upset. 

Bottoms up tonight, I drink to you and I.

Cause with the morning, comes the rest of my life.

And with this empty glass, I will break the past.

Cause with the morning, I can open my eyes.

I want this to be, my awakening.

I give this one to you, an anthem full of truth.

I tell you now, an epic tale, of what you've put me through.

And even though you don't, deserve one of your own.

A melody, a song about the life that you let go.

I can't believe that I still care enough to write.

Bottoms up tonight, I drink to you and I.

Cause with the morning, comes the rest of my life.

And with this empty glass, I will break the past.

Cause with the morning, I can open my eyes.

I want this to be, my awakening.

Yes I miss you still, and probably always will.

I'm living with a busted heart, that I will have until,

I find the strength I know, it's somewhere in my bones.

To pull the curtain up, and get on with this show.. 

At least you know I still care enough to write.

Bottoms up tonight, I drink to you and I.

Cause with the morning, comes the rest of my life. 

And with this empty glass, I will break the past.

Cause with the morning, I can open my eyes.

And maybe I will see, a different destiny.

Like knowing at all, was only a bad dream.

I want this to be, my awakening.

No rest for the wicked, they say.

Forgive me if I try to change,

No rest for the wicked, they say.

Forgive me if I try to change.

Bottoms up tonight, I drink to you and I.

Cause with the morning, comes the rest of my life.

And with this empty glass, I will break the past.

Cause with the morning, I can open my eyes.

And maybe I will see, a different destiny.

Like knowing you at all, was only a bad dream.

I want this to be, my awakening.

I want this to be my awakening. I want to finally break free from everything I've put myself through in the past six months. I want this new dream of mine to come true, to finally meet someone new. Someone who may actually like me enough to stick it through with me. I've got life planned out, I really do now. I'll bring you around the world, I promise I will. We'll leave this place, and runaway together into paradise. Give me time, and I will give you everything I have. 

One last night of self destruction and I'll try my utmost best to quit clubbing and drinking altogether. For a brighter future, I'll do whatever. 

On a side note. 

I have a pet snail. I named it Patrick.

And I eat like a pig.