I surprised myself, when I went clubbing.
I surprised myself, when I didn't get high nor drunk enough to dance.
I surprised myself, when I tried standing up for people whom I barely know.
I surprised myself, when I was sober enough to use my brain instead of my not-so-brawny-brawn.
I surprised myself, when I made the decision that you were not the one for me.
Yesterday was a pretty messy day. I went clubbing, my life went down and down and I finally realised I could do things that I thought I would never do.
So I was over at the mall opposite the club, when I saw the frisbee mates. I tried saying hello, but when I saw how they reacted when I was walking over, my mind was made up. No more Mr Nice Guy. I walked over, said "Oh you" and walked away. I then realised what a douche I was, and what douches they were/are. I finally decided that they are no longer my friends, nor people I would talk to.
And this girl that I was madly crushing on last year, is no longer a target of mine. I know target sounds kinda, trashy? But I have no other words to describe her other than that. When I look back on how she was happy to receive texts from me, purely guesses, and I look at how boring her replies were getting, I told myself that I deserve better. I know she might be pretty, wanted by oh-so-many, and how her grades are better than mine and all those stuffs. But I believe that no one should be treated any lesser than how they treat others.
For example, when I treat you nice, it's by nature that you should treat me nice too. Maybe it was my fault for having such high hopes that you would one day fall for me, maybe it was.
I want to thank Carly Ned for enlightening me. If you haven't checked out her youtube channel yet, you should. It's just a click away.
This post is wayyyy too long for anyone, so I figured I should put up a picture or something.
Cyanide & Happiness @ Explosm.net
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